Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
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She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
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I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.