If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
