I think scott just propositioned me for sex
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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