I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
