i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
