im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
