Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I am mentally ready for anal.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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