i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.