i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.