Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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