i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize