You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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