Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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