She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
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It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
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merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I'm sobbing to NWA
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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