My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
And then he peed in my hair
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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