Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize