Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid