my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
