Texts From Last Night

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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  im ready to get crazy and take my wig off

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  (978): im ready to get crazy and take my wig off http://tfl.nu/0nn5
  Replies (4) Good night (1216) Bad night (703)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash

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  (704): happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash http://tfl.nu/ibz5
  Replies (16) Good night (2540) Bad night (626)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.

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  (914): Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride. http://tfl.nu/fcgf
  Replies (22) Good night (2748) Bad night (516)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...

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  (978): guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out... http://tfl.nu/78da
  Replies (23) Good night (852) Bad night (5252)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs

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  (404): dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs http://tfl.nu/cgkd
  Replies (58) Good night (989) Bad night (12174)
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  (803): View more from South Carolina

  worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.

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  (803): worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week. http://tfl.nu/ib48
  Replies (28) Good night (703) Bad night (3140)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.

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  (610): my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while. http://tfl.nu/6x6m
  Replies (14) Good night (686) Bad night (5700)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.

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  (309): Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still. http://tfl.nu/aa8c
  Replies (11) Good night (5709) Bad night (1306)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?

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  (970): Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face? http://tfl.nu/5us6
  Replies (3) Good night (1543) Bad night (622)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.

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  (214): The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to. http://tfl.nu/ot3b
  Replies (2) Good night (1766) Bad night (583)
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  (714): View more from California

  Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made

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  (714): Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made http://tfl.nu/j4f1
  Replies (7) Good night (1710) Bad night (475)
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  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Omg sara

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty

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  (920): I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3 (906): Omg sara (920): I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty http://tfl.nu/fytc
  Replies (8) Good night (1601) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.

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  (561): Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch. http://tfl.nu/p878
  Replies (2) Good night (1046) Bad night (613)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?

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  (208): Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow? http://tfl.nu/sft8
  Replies (3) Good night (734) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.

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  (734): I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now. http://tfl.nu/9g1m
  Replies (2) Good night (585) Bad night (333)

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