Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
