suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
