That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize