Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
NoShamevember. You game?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
