Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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