I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
