Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
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