Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
