I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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