when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
