on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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