Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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