Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
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