Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Randomize
