I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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