yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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