Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize