Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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