butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
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