I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
