my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize