My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
