He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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