Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
