Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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