never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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