yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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