Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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