Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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