You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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