Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Randomize
