Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
