walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
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There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
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I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
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