i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
